A Cosmopolitan Cover Satire --- And A Quick Rant

Several weeks ago I kept seeing a particular issue of Cosmopolitan magazine all over the newsstands. One phrase on that cover, which also featured the urban singer Rihanna, irked me.

Why in the HELL did the editors at Cosmo assume that they were talking to FIVE-YEAR-OLDS?! What's up, they're afraid that they'll offend people by calling that part of the female anatomy by its correct name, the vagina? I actually felt OFFENDED that WOMEN would mess with the names of their OWN body parts! Bad enough MEN do it, without the WOMEN sinking lower...

*SIGH*... (fail)

Deep inside I was screaming aloud, Dammit to hell, call it a vagina, not a pussy, a C-word, or a "va-JAY-jay", because it reminded me what I read in a Rodale Press encyclopaedia of sex and health about educating children about sex organs, about a passage instructing parents to teach the child to call a penis a penis and not a pee-pee, a wee-wee, or a thing.

After a while, it got me thinking, What if a MEN'S magazine took a similar approach with that shit? Well, I finally assembled such a cover, and here you go, with those two covers side by side. And you'll probably thank God that men's magazines DON'T have to resort to that crap --- unless they want to be excluded from most mass market stores!

Want an enlarged version of the satire? Here you go...

I hope like HELL that the folks at Cosmo see THIS satire! And I will GLADLY claim that one! Maybe THEY can see just HOW RIDICULOUS they looked with that cover, eh?
And oh yes, USE THE CORRECT LANGUAGE FOR ANATOMICAL PARTS, FOR CHRIST'S SAKES!!!